It’s 5 in the morning and I’m sitting on the tarmac in Sacramento.

Bound for Maine.

She called me nearly two weeks ago and left a message saying she just wanted to hear my voice. Everything was fine, she offered, knowing that I would worry otherwise.

My grandmother.

I meant to call her back.

I wanted to call her back. To hear her voice.

But, one day’s deadlines followed another day’s search for a new bathing suit for Katie, and another day of, well, life. Little fires that we all put out daily.

Each night, as I lay in bed, I remembered that I had forgotten to return her call and each night I vowed to call her the next day.

Because she would be there. She has always been there. Always.

Yesterday, always ended. She suffered a massive heart attack in her sleep and my chance to call her back… to hear her voice… evaporated.

So now, I sit here. Waiting to go and be there for her funeral. And I am filled regret and such profound sorrow.

If you owe someone a phone call… a letter… a visit, don’t wait for tomorrow.

Because there are no guarantees that there will be another tomorrow.

Thank you, Craig, for scooping me off the floor when I got the news.
Thank you for knowing that I had to go home… had to be there.
Thank you for immediately researching last-minute flights and for securing my travel when I could do nothing but sob.
Thank you for always being who I need in any given moment.


  1. Lizz

    Oh, my sweet friend, I’m so sorry for your loss.
    I have family in Maine, let me know if we can help!

  2. Sherri

    Oh, this hurts my heart all over again…I am so very sorry, and I agree with you. Don’t ever wait.

  3. Shell

    I’m so sorry for your loss. xo

  4. I am so sorry for your loss. Thank you for having the grace to remind me of the calls and emails I need to take the time to respond to. Prayers and hugs for you and your family…

  5. tracy@sellabitmum

    So many hugs to you my friend. xoxo

  6. Sara

    Waiting for you with hugs in Maine <3

  7. Rachel Voorhees

    So sorry for your loss. Thinking about you. xoxo

  8. Cam

    Oh sweet friend, sending you a lot of love.

  9. Melissa

    Oh Nichole, I’m so so sorry for your loss. Sending you hugs and safe travels.

  10. Cookin Canuck

    Nichole, I am so, so sorry for your loss. You are in my thoughts. xo

  11. Oh Nichole…. I’m so, so very sorry. Thinking of you and sending love. Safe travels. xoxo

  12. Alexandra

    I’m so sorry. Sorry for your loss and your pain. I’ve learned three times this year, there is no guarantee of tomorrow. And that reality, changes us. I’m so sorry, N.

  13. Kim Tracy Prince

    Oh Nichole…that’s me. That could be me. How heartbreaking. I’m so sorry.

  14. julie

    So sorry to hear the news. My thoughts are with you.

  15. I’m sending love and light to you and your family during this difficult time.

    As you struggle with the end of ‘always’, it’s so beautiful of you to remind us to send that letter, make that phone call, visit that friend. Thank you for that.

    Thinking of you. XO

  16. Leigh Ann

    I’m so sorry, Nichole. So very sorry.

  17. Stefanie Durant

    I am so so sorry for your loss, Nichole. Nanas are special people. I still miss mine everyday but the grief and sadness lessens. My thoughts are with you.

  18. Mandy

    I’m so very sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you. xoxox

  19. Margaret

    I’m so sorry to hear about you loss, my friend. My thoughts and hugs are with you.

  20. Peggy

    It’s 4:45 and I’ve just checked your flight, to see that you arrived 10 minutes early. We will be waiting for you tonight..with lots of hugs, a shoulder or two to cry on.
    I am so sorry. I know how close you were with your grandparents.
    As for Craig…he’s a rockstar.

  21. Vikki

    I’m so sorry.

  22. Maria

    Oh Nichole, I’m so sorry.

  23. Tonya

    Nothing is guaranteed, especially not tomorrow.

    Thinking of you and sending love and peace during this very difficult time. xoxo

  24. Alison

    I am so very sorry for your loss. xo

  25. Amy

    I’m so sorry for your loss. xo

  26. Kir

    I am so incredibly sorry. Sending love, hugs and comfort to you during this time.

  27. Deborah

    I am so sorry for your loss Nichole. There are no words. Keeping you and your family in my prayers. XO

  28. Penny

    How so very you to stop in the midst of your grief to offer such powerful words of wisdom to us. Thank you. May your memories bring you comfort and keep her alive in your heart.

  29. Greta

    I am so, so sorry for your loss. Sending hugs and love and strength.

  30. Jayme

    Oh sweetie, I am so sorry for your loss. Thinking of you and sending healing prayers.

  31. Natalie

    I’m here…for anything. And sending more love than you can imagine. xo

  32. Rusti

    my heart aches for you. I’m so sorry for your loss Nichole. sending love and prayers. XO

  33. Renee

    I’m so sorry for your loss, Nichole. I send hugs to you and yours.

  34. Ann Imig

    So very sorry, Nichole. Sending love.

  35. TheNextMartha

    Lots of love to you.

  36. Meg {Phase Three of Life}

    I’m so sorry. Thinking about you.

  37. anymommy

    I am so very sorry. Much love to you and peace.

  38. Shana

    I’m so sorry for your loss, Nichole.

  39. I am so sorry. May you find comfort in your memories of her.

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