There are times when I sit down to write and the words just flow…when the words are there, just waiting to be written.
This isn’t one of those times.
Each time I sit down to write this letter, I stare at a blank screen.
That is how much I love you, my sweet boy.
There just aren’t words to tell you how much.
You are, without question, one of my life’s greatest gifts.
Each night, in the darkness of your bedroom, I hold you close in your rocking chair and I grasp for the words to tell you what you mean to me.
Five minutes…ten…fifteen…just a few minutes more.
I know that I should go…but you make me weak.
With your kisses; what were once nose kisses are now proper cheek kisses.
With your hugs and the way you hold onto me as though just a few minutes longer are all you’ll need.
Most nights, I can barely tear myself away from you…from the whispers and the hugs.
Thank you, Matthew…thank you for wearing your love for me on the outside…for holding me with all that you are.
Each night, as I close the door to your room, I feel as though you couldn’t possibly know how much I love you.
Because there aren’t words for this kind of love.
So, I will spend my lifetime showing you.
Happy second birthday, my beautiful boy.
You are my sunshine.
With a heart bursting with love,