Vulnerability and Connection

There’s a softness in Katie sometimes, a vulnerability that she wears on the outside if she has exasperated me or tried my patience. And if I’m truly present, I can catch it and wrap her up in acknowledgment and words of unconditional love.

Today, as I helped her to get ready for her nap, her lovely little face was softer, even more tender than usual.

I sat down on the floor, gathered those suddenly-long limbs up into my lap, and brushed her hair from her cheeks.

I looked at her…really looked at her…and told her what I feel from the core of who I am, that she and her brother are the most important things in our world.

Her eyes glistened and she relaxed into me.

I squeezed her even closer and then helped her settle into her bed. I kissed her and said my I love yous and came downstairs, collected my coffee cup and laptop, and turned on the baby monitor.

As I do each afternoon, I checked on her brother, then switched over to the other channel to check on her, and heard her telling her white kitty, “Know what, White Kitty? You are the most important thing in the world.”

In an instant, I knew that the she truly hears me…that my words find their way into her heart.

And in that moment, I wore my vulnerability on the outside.


  1. jfarelyn

    good for you. im so glad you have crystallized this moment and shared it with us. Its so validating when we hear that our children really hear us.

  2. Loved this. Such a heart warming post! Thanks for sharing!

  3. Rachel

    Ahhhhh……sweet sighs….loved this beautiful post. :-)

  4. This warmed my heart. How sweet!

  5. Peggy

    And that my dear is a true small moment. And that just brought tears to your uncle's eyes.

  6. jessb27

    Such a sweet moment and you expressed it so beautifully with words as always.

  7. Sherri

    Oh, this is too sweet! She does hear you, and she has the caring nature to extend your thoughts to others that she loves…even her stuffed animals. So sweet, and didn't that just make your heart sing?!

  8. Yuliya

    You are beautiful. But you made me cry. i will have my revenge!

  9. Oh, this was so lovely! I mean, all your writing is. But I really loved this one! :)

  10. I just felt all warm inside after reading this. Thank you for sharing these moments Nichole.

  11. SquashedMom

    Just lovely. Hold onto these moments, and play them back to yourself the next time you are berating yourself for a minor parenting fail. Because this, the magical good stuff? Far outweighs the other, and is who you truly are as a parent. Just saying.

  12. Awwwwww! I feel the same when I see my girl caring for her stuffed animals. And when I hear her call them the same pet names I use for her. Siiiiiigh is right!

  13. Cate

    Oh my gosh, my heart! It melts! That is so, so sweet.

  14. CDG

    Sometimes your pieces strike me so deeply that I can't actually comment. But I read. I do.

  15. andygirl

    I'm melting. so incredibly lovely, my dear.

  16. Matty

    Simply beautiful. Never underestimate the power and depth of your words. Children absorb and understand more than we realize.

  17. Krista

    I love this. The way the moment played out, the sweetness of your little girl and the way you write about it. All truly inspiring.

  18. 2bkate

    This moved me so much!! Lovely so lovely

  19. Awwww…what a precious moment. They have a knack of taking our breath away at unsuspecting moments and they never even know it.

  20. JDareG

    What a sweet moment to capture and keep in your heart. Thanks for sharing it.

  21. Love, love, love this moment! Every time my son hugs his bear, kisses it's boo boo, or whispers I love you, my heart swells.
    I love to see them learn love by being loved.

  22. Melissa

    Love…love…love this. XO. Beautiful words that our children need to hear on a daily basis. And the vulnerability? We are awash in it once children enter our lives.

  23. Sigh. That is so very lovely and the epitome of why I love coming here so very, very much. Thank you.

  24. Mandi

    That is such a nice moment to overhear. The thought of it fills my proverbial from-the-heart cup to the fill line. Great post!

  25. Oh that sprung the tears right out of me!!! Lovely, lovely moment :D

  26. Kay

    Takes me back to a little girl 30 years ago who heard my words and now repeats them to her sons. Wonderful post.

  27. tsonoda148

    Ah, that was just lovely. I suddenly feel quite vulnerable myself. And humbled. Feelings for our children come raw and sometimes unexpected and always welcomed. Just lovely Nichole. I'm crying.

  28. Natalie

    Sigh…sweet tears after reading this – it's beautiful.

    And those eyes!!

  29. What a doll! Beautifully written, as always.

  30. Kris

    This was so sweet. It made me realize I need to slow down. I'm missing some of these moments in my rush to get things done.

  31. 30ish Mama

    I would have cried buckets…to know that your words are heard and understood. But the really beautiful part is knowing that you have taught her how to love.

  32. ksluiter

    and this is why I have to stop saying damn in front of Eddie.

    seriously though, this made me all swoony. I love LOVE how you take the time to make each of your children feel so special. I strive for this, Nichole.

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