Dear Katie and Matthew,
I have always known that I had enough love in my heart for both of you. I knew that I would love you to the moon and back. I also realized that I would love you differently.
What I didn’t know is that I would love each of you even more because of the other.
Where you, Katie, weren’t one for extended cuddling, Matthew cannot get enough. Those hugs and snuggles that he gives me flood a place in my heart that needed filling. But, his readiness to offer me so much affection makes me love and appreciate you more. When you approach me and ask me to snuggle with you, my heart nearly explodes because I can feel the love radiate off you in those moments. I know that they matter to you…each and every hug, kiss, and cuddle is invaluable.
And Matthew, when you take risks, climbing on everything, throwing yourself in over your head, I remember how Katie was more reserved. I had often worried that she was too timid and wondered if I should help teach her to take some risks. Now? When my heart lurches in my chest at the sight of you standing on the sofa, just giggling with delight, I am so proud of you, but I also appreciate Katie’s careful and deliberate nature.
Katie, you were such a peaceful baby. Life with you was like a dance…rhythmic and easy. Your daddy and I felt as though we were doing something right and believed in of ourselves as parents. When I needed to feel strong and confident, you gave me that. I will never forget that, Katherine. When Matthew arrived, there was no dancing. We ran hurdles…what felt like insurmountable hurdles. But they weren’t and we worked through the sleeping and reflux troubles and ever so slowly we found our rhythm. He pushed me to dig deep, to reach for solutions and then new solutions when those no longer worked. He taught me that I’m tougher and more resilient than I ever imagined.
Katie, you entered my world and taught me what it was to be a mother, to love beyond comprehension, and Matthew, you taught me about surprises and about trusting fate.
I am so grateful for your differences. For your individual strengths and weaknesses. You have taught me so much about myself…about your father…about life.
I couldn’t have asked for more wonderful children.
You are each made even more precious by your sibling.
I love you beyond measure, my beautiful babies,