The Here and Now

There’s something about Sundays that always brings me sadness.

I wake on Sunday mornings, realizing that this is the last day of the weekend, the last day that we are all together, as a family, for five more days.

My family is at its best when it’s the four of us, together. We work best that way.

When Craig is at the office, a piece of who we are is missing, a piece that adds spark, fun, spontaneity, silliness, and love. Without him here, there is an emptiness.

I’m all about the small moments. I don’t wish away a single day of this life. We made a vow when Katie was first born to never say, “I can’t wait until she can walk…talk…run.” Because to wish for those things was to not appreciate the here and now. To wish for those things means that the here and now is unimportant, or at best, less important, less magical than the current moment.

But on Sunday mornings, I feel the strongest pull to wish away time…the desire for it to be Friday again. To make the next five days fly by.

And each and every week, I promise myself that I will view the weekend glass as half full…there is still an entire day ahead of me, but I must admit that I fail miserably each week and end up spending far too much of my Sundays dreading the next day. I catch myself counting the hours left and they always fly by far too quickly.

What begins as melancholy on Sunday morning evolves into sadness by afternoon and into teariness by evening.

Sundays are not my friend.

But Craig? He is magic. He truly is.

I scored. I really, really scored.

I would give anything for a lifetime of Saturdays with my little family…

This post is linked up with Stream of Conseiousness Sunday, at

This kind of writing is challenging for me. ┬áIt leaves me vulnerable and often with a better understanding of what I’m feeling, as I can’t self-censor my thoughts.


  1. Yuliya

    "A lifetime of Saturdays with my family" an absolutely perfect sentiment that I wholeheartedly agree with. Maybe if we put our brains together we could invent a time machine of sorts?

  2. You are absolutely right…a lifetime of Saturdays with the family would be the best thing ever!!

  3. ksluiter

    I was so blessed this summer to have 3 months of Saturdays with my family. now that I am back to work, I feel this post so much. Sundays are full of sad for me. It's like I just get into a nice little routine by being home and I am thrust back out into the world without my family.


  4. I completely understand that sentiment. Sundays depress the crap outta me. Here's to Friday evenings!

  5. Krista

    How amazing that you had the foresight to make a promise not to wish for your daughter to be able to walk and talk. I wish I had done that, really done that and lived in the moment.

  6. @mommyhead7

    I understand exactly what you mean. It is only Monday's that I wish would slow down. I wish away the rest of the week for Monday's, since that is my husband's day off.____You are a really good writer. I enjoyed this post alot.

  7. SquashedMom

    Hi, Nichole. I wish I understood what you mean. Sigh. One of the big issues in my life is how my family is not a cohesive unit, and time with the four of us together is barely existant, let alone glorious. I love my husband, but he is not a kid person. He loves our sons at a deep level, but the day to day? He HATES to spend time with his children, and he is awkward and clumsy with them, not intimate.

    This is the biggest source of sorrow in my life right now, and something I can't blog about, since my husband and his family members read my blog. This was a lovely post, and I did enjoy it, but through a veil of envy and sadness.

  8. I hear you.

    That is all I can say.

    I have not time-stopper.

    But if I did, I would loan it to you every singe Sunday morning.

  9. kris

    I am going to be all contrary and say that without the sadness of Sunday? Without that knowledge that a whole week stretches before you until you reach that next Saturday? Without that anticipation?

    Saturdays would be less sweet.

    If every day was Saturday? Saturdays would quickly lose their meaning.


    All moments are not the same. All time spent together is not equal.

    Saturdays are special.

    That's a good thing.

  10. Fadra

    I think my favorite day of the week is Thursday. Because I know the next day is Friday. I'll be home with my son and my husband will probably be home early and I know we have the whole weekend together. Family time is cool.

  11. I think you need to let go of whatever guilt you're feeling over… feeling. But don't hate Monday on Sunday – just wait til Monday to hate it. Let yourself spend a good hour really hating Monday. Then stop. And let yourself look forward to Friday. And be grateful that you get him *every* weekend. Some families have no daddy or a fair-weather daddy. And yours? An intact loving family? Very very special.
    I agree with Krista that it was amazing you even thought about not wishing for milestones. Just reading THAT made me feel like a crappy mom. My oldest will be 12 tomorrow and I feel like I haven't treasured enough of the milestones.
    I wish you peace about this whole situation, I can tell you are really hurting over it.
    I'm relatively new to your blog & I really enjoy your writing!

  12. I absolutely cherish the weekend time when my husband is home and our family is together, but I have to be honest and say part of me looks forward to Monday morning. During the week, when it is just SB and me, we have a routine. Our life is scheduled, and things just flow much easier. On the weekends, our routine is shot, and that causes issues with SB, which causes me stress. It can be very chaotic and unpredictable. SB does better with scheduled and predictable. She's just one of those kids, not very flexible. So as much as I love all of us being together, I'm glad we have the balance when it is not so. Does that make sense?

  13. I’m the same way with Sundays. I always feel out of sorts, feeling like we have a short window to cram all of our family time in. While prepping for the week ahead.

  14. A lifetime of Saturdays would be nice, but for me these days, it would a lifetime of Sundays, as Todd recently started working on Saturdays. Just 10-2, but still. Beautiful piece.

  15. ~*Jess*~

    This is precious. And I feel the same way.

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