We’ve already established that I’ve told a lie.
Okay, maybe a couple of lies.
But I have another gem that I must confess to.
Katie was watching DVRed PBS recently and when her show ended, I didn’t rush to turn it off. After the commercial break, I heard a sound that nearly paralyzed me with fear.
The Barney theme song.
I went into full stunt person mode and dove for the remote to push pause before she could figure out what was happening.
No Barney. Ever. Not on my watch.
Well, she caught enough of a glance to want to know what that “purple thing” was.
So, I did what all sane mothers would do. I lied.
Here’s the problem: I am a bad liar. An atrocious liar. I don’t think well on the fly and here’s what I offered up to her:
Those kids are on that show with that purple guy named Fred because they aren’t good listeners. Their parents sent them to Fred so that he can teach them how to listen to their parents. They can’t go home until they learn better listening skills.
That was the best that I could come up with.
So now, whenever I tell her that she’s not being a good listener, she asks if she’ll have to go see Fred.
Sigh. There’s a good year of therapy I’ll be paying for.
Any chance you can make me feel better by sharing some of your best gems?